A Loss. A poem.

I feel the absence The missing jigsaw heart That once made me whole And now makes me hole I feel every teardrop Every rip and tear Every shake and rattle And every distant sigh I feel the darkness These clouds and storms That weather and wither My very being An emptiness That can’t be filledContinue reading “A Loss. A poem.”

Share. A poem.

Would that I could share this success with you? All the excess and fortune Pointing to moments unsolicited And gratuitous and circumspect All these worlds and words Of self doubt and self pity Replaced by self esteem And confidential confidence Would that I could share this success with you Even if only for one lastContinue reading “Share. A poem.”

The Pantomime. A poem.

The tears keep me awake at night; they burn my eyes and ducts, sodden flames licking, smoke broiling, consuming the room of my head until I’m fit to choke on all the pointless condescension, spluttering, unkempt, raw and misbegotten. Soaked in a pantomime of longing and rejection until the show is over. Those tears remain,Continue reading “The Pantomime. A poem.”

Family Lost. A poem.

I’d long lost sight of my family As I descended the stairs slowly Those stairs they were so tricky It was easy to trip and slippery They climbed up the darkened stairs Out of my tomb and into the air Tasted golden winds of change Above ripples in the water made Four cold walls forContinue reading “Family Lost. A poem.”

Three Years Later…

So, here I am, three years after the most harrowing time of my life and everything is pretty much still the same.  I’m not any closer to finding a real purpose. I still have no love in my life. I’m still socially isolated. I still have no idea what I’m doing (my prayers sound likeContinue reading “Three Years Later…”

Saturday Night. A poem.

Streets afire with love divine Taking names and stumbling feet Liquor-fuelled lust surrounds Like ships that sail on silken sheets Uproarious dinner conversations Filled with gentle goodbyes And enthusiastic hellos And iPhone intermissions A cello paints the night In shades of blue and grey Pining for the one that flew Internal circumspection played Each over-revvedContinue reading “Saturday Night. A poem.”

Defeat. A poem.

My last vestige of hope Beaten from me with the crowbar Of fear and distaste in your eyes Each blow taking my breath Bloodying my mind and soul Making me less of a man Until there’s nothing left But anger at the injustice of it all The irony of lie and truth If I’d liedContinue reading “Defeat. A poem.”

Wasting. A poem.

Wasting away for you It’s the least that I can do Collapsed into myself My own considerable hell Lying here balled and foetal A fate completely total Floating in dead space All oxygen sucked away Darkness perpetuated Emptiness encapsulated Exhausted and beset Consumed with regret Wasting away for you It’s the least that I canContinue reading “Wasting. A poem.”