Mental Health, Writing

Conveyor Belt

Here I am again. Back on the conveyor, darkness seeping to my core. I tried to get off but just wasn’t up to it.

I float through the day, lost in motion that takes me no where. The conveyor clicks and clanks and rolls and on I flow.

When I’m down like this I find it hard to break out. Hard to raise my head and look for a way. Hard to find a reason why I should. Hard to find a reason to go on. Everything is too difficult. Too pointless. But I don’t give up on life. I’ve been down and out enough times to know that’s no longer an option. 

So the conveyor rolls on, guiding me through the darkness that surrounds my head and heart. Maybe even now, there’s a light at the end of that long tunnel. Maybe then I could lift myself up and leave this place behind.

But not today.

Steve

5 thoughts on “Conveyor Belt”

    1. Hi Kitt. Thank you. I choose life every time. Unfortunately, I’ve tried suicide and it’s not an experience I care to repeat. The impact on others is profound if you succeed. So, I advocate living over death every time, no matter how hard things get.

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    1. Thanks, Maria. I have ups and downs. I’m back to a ‘high’ in my cycle at the moment, so feeling pretty good, but I wrote that in a ‘trough’. I’m getting better at moderating my depression, overall, though. 🙂

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